Thirty Years Wasted, Trying To Change

I have, at most, a couple of months to find a way of making a living, or risk destitution.

I’ve spent the last thirty years trying to turn into a go-getting action-orientated type. That’s what everyone says is the personality we should have. Mostly, I’ve failed. The few times I’ve succeeded, I’ve become chronically miserable.

Recently, I discovered from an online psychologist that your personality type is hard-wired, that my efforts to change have been wasted. Unfortunately for INTPs, there aren’t many ways of making a living that don’t make us miserable or drive us mad. At least, that’s my experience.

I have, at most, a couple of months to find a way of making a living – in my forties – or risk destitution.

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My Current Situation

I rarely leave the house more than once a week.

I am currently in Hermit Mode, and have been for over five years. This means that I haven’t seen my friends in all that time, and only occasionally see any member of my family. I rarely leave the house more than once a week. My income is so low that I don’t have enough money to pay my bills, or to buy clothes if I ever needed to attend a job interview.

My attempts to run a business over the past three years have been so inept that I would have been better off playing the lottery instead. I would have lost less money, and even won some of it back.